Crazy Haveen

Happiness.

2010-08-19T17:10:00.005+08:00

Previously, on my FB shoutout: "People will be there to share your sorrows but never your joy". I've friends asking me if I'm fine and what made me think so.

I realise this is part of the human nature. When you're depressed, there will DEFINITELY be people out there to console you and tell you that you're not alone. ONLY those who truly love you will not utter a word but stand silently by your side and catch you when you fall. As a matter of fact, people prefer to hear the negative stuffs that happen to help them feel better of themselves. Thinking, I'm luckier than her and I've whatever she don't.

When you've wonderful news and happiness you wanna share and spread the joy, not everyone will take it in with an open heart. What you get will be a smile and a brush you away statement saying, "Oh! Good for you or well done". And they will say no more. People will always have the tendency to wanna outdo each other. So ya, that's why I always believe that people can never share your joy. Disagree? Prove me otherwise. :)

A Good Mum.

2010-07-24T09:46:00.002+08:00

As I watch Landis grows each day, I question myself, "Am I being a good enough mummy for him?" I told my mum the other day... "What's the 'definition' of a good mummy? It would be much easier if there's a guide book for mummy!" And of cos, she flashed me the you-must-be-crazy look. LOL.

My mum is a role model to me. Is really hard to live up to her standard but irregardless, I'm still trying. She told me being a good mummy is to understand your child and give him what he needs NOT what he wants. Putting your children as your first priority and sacrificing ALL your personal leisure for them. Is more like getting your children evolve in your life. To many, these are easier said than done. BUT my mum does it ALL. Even till today, my parents are supposed to join their friends on a holiday to Hokkaido, Japan. But because of work and their timing is near to my delivery, they for go it. I'm thankful for their act of loves for us.

After thinking hard for days, I conclude that I may not give Landis the most lavished parties, the high-end clothing or even get him the most sophisticated toys. But I know that I've given him all my unconditional loves, hugs, kisses, protections & education. Even if one day, we may be able to lead a extravaganza life, I will NOT educate him in a way that power and money is everything. I would still want him to learn that life is MORE THAN managing a listed company, or going for high end parties and all the material & plastic images portrayed.

People may think I'm NUTS to not hope for luxurious life; for my sons. Seriously, when you think about it, that's where human lose all their moral values and conscious to. I don't want that for my sons. I just want them to learn and practice to be a righteous leader yet a good follower, be someone people will look up to because of his fairness and good personalities, and be able to do goods to our society. That will be good enough for me, and to then, I'll truly know that I've been a good mummy to them. :)

Vacation!

2010-07-07T16:39:00.002+08:00

Vacation, vacation, vacation... :D

This morning, my hubby was asking me AGAIN; "Have you decided on where you wanna go after you deliver our second boy?"

He is planning on bringing me oversea to take a break from EVERYTHING... But then again, I'm not even sure if I can bear to part with my 2 boys. Anyways, he gave me 7 locations to choose from.

1. Japan
2. Korea
3. Maldives
4. New Zealand
5. Australia
6. Hawaii
7. Bintan - I told him, "You can go there yourself hor!" LOL... :D

Its really hard to make a choice. BUT!!! I asked him, if he will be providing a sum of shopping fees, I dun mind Japan. WAHAHAHA!

And he replied, "SEE HOW!". Oh well, I still have MONTHS to think about it. For my siblings & friends, you can leave a message in my Cbox on which country you think I should visit. Till then, I'll ask him to be patient and wait for my final answer. :D

Back Again.

2010-06-23T16:14:00.003+08:00

Hi all. YES! The gender of my second baby is out! IS A BOY! :D We're overjoyed and Landis is not going to be lonely anymore. :) The detailed scan on the 17th June had great news for us; as we found out that our lil darling is healthy and active. Papa Toh was smiling like a loony during the scan. LOL!!! I know he is delighted and excited. :)

Here I share a link that one of my friend, Avryl posted. This is indeed what marriage and love is all about. Check it out. :)

I got to cut short my post as I'm not in my best these few days. Bad headaches, but no worries, I'll Be Back once I'm better. :) Peace Out. :)

Laughs!

2010-06-10T16:03:00.004+08:00

For the past 2 days, my (secondary school) classmates were "debating" in Facebook; on how Landis or other kids should address them. And laughing at the wrongly tagged names. Mostly cos, of the "bodily figure" difference between the two guys. Thou is NOT really that obvious in the photo, I find it really hilarious that the guys were soooooooo particular bout it. :D

Anyways, we're STILL trying to fix a date to meet up and laugh some more. Till then, we will be terrorising each other FB page. LOL. :D

Life.

2010-05-28T11:05:00.002+08:00

Happy Vesak Day, Peeps! :)

I manage to sleep in alittle today. Last night was pretty much of a good night. :) Thou my hubby was on night duty, I've got a couple of great companions (Zhen Xin and Mike). They dropped by to pass me a pair of shoes they bought for Landis, and we chatted for bout an hour when suddenly heads popped out of my window!!! :) Surprisingly, my siblings popped by to eat supper with me!!! PRATAS with CURRY at 11pm (the cause of my tummy ache this morning! LOL!)!!! :) And of cos, we chatted till early dawn. :D I seriously loveeee them to bits!!!! :)

Something reflective happened yesterday. My mum's customer came by, together with her mum; who seem alittle mental unwell. Her daughter was there to tailor more clothes for her mum and at the same time bringing her around leisurely. After they left, I told my mum,

"This is what we called 'unconditional love', isn't it? Look, her daughter doesn't care bout how people look at them and still spend TIME and LOVE on her mum this way. Most people we know will either grumble is too troublesome to bring the elderly out or practically keep them shut at home or worst, old folks home."

Distinctively at the same moment, an incident my mum told me years back strike me. Previously, at a wet market near our workplace, a blind elderly lady was abandoned by her son and her daughter-in-law. They drove her from their home (which was nowhere near the East) to that specify wet-market and asked her to wait for them while they shop for groceries. She sat waited and waited till the NEXT day.

When some of the stall owners saw her in the morning, they asked her how come she was still there? She told them that her son and daughter-in-law had asked her to wait for them while they buy the groceries and she was wondering what was taking them so long. When the stall owners told her that she had already sat there for a day, she burst-ed into tears! A police report was made and guess what? Her son WAS actually a SCHOOL PRINCIPAL!!! Notice I use WAS, cos after this incident he was terminated!

How can a child be so heartless to abandon his own parent? How can he sleep at night? After suffering so long to bring him up and this is how he repay her by dumping her in a wet-market? I tear even when I think bout it. My mum knew it hit my weak spot and she told me that this is LIFE. An elderly once told her,

IF you've a filial son and good daughter-in-law, you're blessed.

IF you've a filial son BUT a difficult daughter-in-law, your life will be hard.

IF you've an unfilial son and a difficult daughter-in-law, your life's cursed.

IF you've an unfilial son BUT a good daughter-in-law, you're safe.

(That goes with the same saying of a daughter as well.)

I made my conclusion, but it's more to my personal thoughts. I feel it's not on how well educated, rich and powerful a person maybe. I think is more to the character and the goodness of a person. Yes, some may say that goodness is inborn, but I think goodness can be cultivated as well. BUT of cos I do understand that there are sacrifices that have to be made when we're talking about being FILIAL. Its NOT just talks or even by giving our parents money monthly. Its so much more than that.

All in all, is just a simple question to ourselves. Are you WILLING to put your parents' thoughts and welfare before yourself, LOVE them and ACCEPT them even when old age handicapped their life and need to depend on you till their souls rest?

Well, my answer is for me to know and this's for you to be honest to yourself. :)

Irritated!

2010-05-25T09:56:00.002+08:00

This is something I've been feeling for the past month. I'm not complaining but just trying to "flush" it out, of my system. No matter how nice or patience a person can be, there is ALWAYS a limit. When there are certain additional factors throw in, the tolerance level maybe effected too. I realise most people are too into "me, myself and I" and turn out not very compassionate or even sympathetic. Well, it's kinda sad but I'm much immune to it now.

People like to see what they wanna see, and hear what they love to hear. I can't possibly pleased everyone. I'm JUST a human as well. Seriously, I doubt even God can please everyone. I guess it's a norm to see me so quiet and solemn, but is not something I can control. I would love to be that hyper-cheerful-radiant-outgoing Kimberly, my loved ones and friends know and love. But at this moment in time, you seriously can't expect to find much of the energy ions in my body.

My body is screaming help, my mind is crowded with piles and piles of craps, my soul just wanna rest. But I can't possibly just throw everything aside to get the rest that I need. That would be too selfish of me to do so. I still have a family in my hands, especially my lil darling boy who needs me.

Maybe you would say, because you can't let go and be selfish that's why you are suffering. BUT I would love to think that because I can't let go, that's why I keep pushing on; my son is that special motivation for me to move on and my husband is that pillar that I always lean on when I need a breather. :)

It will be another few months before the arrival of my lil darling, so till then, I'll just be known as the ICE QUEEN!!! LOL!!! After November, the reborn Kimberly will be BACK. This, I PROMISE. :)

P.S: Dear Hubby, I know you tried all means to get me out of the house and chill. BUT, for now, I prefer to stay home, rest and be embrace with the love you and Landis shower on me. :) I'm too exhausted to even talk, remember? Bear with me, hun. :)

P.P.S: My baby's gender will be known in 17th June. I will update soon again IF my dizziness can spare me from time to time. :) Loves~

Missing Part.

2010-05-06T23:25:00.002+08:00

Now I'm in my bedroom, lying in my cosy corner. My son is way asleep and my hubby is out working (night shift). It's been awhile since he works in the night. So I can't help missing his presence.

I'm lying here looking at my tummy bump and my lil boy. It's amazing how far we've come. Flashbacks of how we first met came knocking in my head. In my sweet 15, he stole my heart away. Then comes friendship, and our courtship when I'm 17. I remember how hard we've to saved up our allowance to meet, the hard times when we've to share our food, and of cos his army days. I guess those days of courtship, build up our foundation in a relationship. Seriously, I lose count on the exact days/years we dated. :P

Talking bout fond memories, one was when we FIRST went roller blading! Hahaha! He couldn't believe what a daredevil I'm! He held onto my hand and when we were half way down the slope, I turned and told him, "Dude, I dunno how to brake." He looked terrified! To break my fall, he suffered scratches and he told me, "Never do that again! Tell me what else you dunno. OMG! You dunno how to blade and you dare to try the slope?!" ~ unbelievable look and shook head. LOL! :D

Another, was when he proposed in a cafe; after he sernaded. I wouldn't go in the details, but we always had a good laugh whenever we talked bout his proposal! :)

I'll always remember the time he brought me around on his bicycle. We can travel from Changi to Tampines to Simei... And he would always teased me that I put on weight when he rode up slope. :) The time he waited anxiously outside the operating theatre and promised me that he will be the first man I see when I'm out of the theatre. The way he tear when he saw me pale from my operation. The way he laughed, cheered and jumped when he first knew he was going to be a dad. The labour of Landis, when he told me how proud he is of me and thank me for loving him so much to go thru all the torments and pains to give him a complete family.

It can go on and on. Because absence makes a heart fonder, it makes me feel complete just to think of him and his love. It'll be just another few hours before he comes home. I'll just let sleep takes me away for now. When dawn arrives, I know I'll be awaken by his sweet morning kiss. :)

The OSCAR Scan.

2010-04-25T13:42:00.002+08:00

As promised, here's the update of how my OSCAR scan went on the 22nd April 2010 (Thursday). :)

For the past few days, I was down right exhausted!!! OSCAR scan was either a 5mins affair or a 5hrs torture! MINE? 2hrs! =_=!!! YES!!! My lil one decided NOT to be very co-operative that day, and I had to scan twice to get all the measurements. My lil one just refused to lay down, and kept turning and moving all over. When AT LONG LAST, all the details were taken and Papa was allowed to enter the room to check out the lil one. You will NOT believe what happen! He/She was lying down in the exact position we needed from the start and was so well-behaved!

The nurse's jaw dropped and said to my baby, "I DUN BELIEVE YOU! Papa should have come in earlier to save Mummy from all the discomforts, and me from all the trouble!" LOL!!! This lil one DEFINITELY have the mischief like the elder brother!!! P.s, Landis gave us alot of problems for his OSCAR scan too!!! :D

The report was out yesterday and the nurse called to inform me that my lil one was fine. :) I breathe a sigh of relief. As I faithfully stepped into the 2nd trimester of my pregnancy, I'm thankful that my appetite is slowly coming back. For now, I'll just pray and count my blessings instead of my bad days. :)

Old Messages.

2010-04-18T19:35:00.003+08:00

Thru my pregnancy, I have my good and bad days. Today is, well... abit of both. One moment, I can be fine and hyper with Landis, and the next I'm breathless and feeling retardedly slow! Sigh... So when I was resting this morning and clearing old messages in my mobile phone, the messages from my youngest sister brought a smile to me.

For the record, she is in her sweet 17, mature and outspoken; an independent girl with a mind of her own. Here is what she text-ed me unexpectedly one morning, while I'm busy at work.

Catty: Da Jie, in your opinion, is having sex about pleasure or for the sake of reproduction? I've been thinking about this issue.

Me: (hit by a frying pan look) It depends on individual!!! Xiao mei, please dun freak me out!!! Lol! To me, SEX is pleasure, whereas MAKING LOVE is bout mutual loving and having children. :)

Catty: Lol! Da jie, I think its very normal for a 17 year old person to ask such questions as she's analysing about this issue. I am not so foolish to do anything stupid. But sometimes thinking about such things'll make me learn things more maturely what!

See, I told you she is something else, right! :) No prize for guessing why she was her secondary school Student Body President. LOL...

As usual, today we went back to my in-laws' place. On our way home, something happened. Something STUPIDLY HILARIOUS by me! =_=!!!

I was on the phone, waiting for the next party to pick up, when I saw a lorry with those bright coloured fanciful lightnings all over. I turned and told my hubby, "Dear, hey look! Is that the Chingay lorry?" He choked, taken back and started laughing!

After I ended the call, he told me; still stifling with his laugh, "Dear, that's not the Chingay lorry. Chingay ended months back. That's a funeral procession lorry." And he burst out laughing AGAIN when we saw another similar vehicle further up the highway! He was so amused by what I said. But seriously, I felt so DUMB! We had a good laugh bout it thou. Sigh, what a way to end our Sunday. :)

Cold.

2010-04-03T22:42:00.002+08:00

Its a cold, rainy Saturday night. As usual, I'm sitting in my comfort zone, breathing in the cold damp air while my fingers are leisurely "clicking" away on my keyboard. :)

Yes, Landis is long in his lala land; dreaming that he is playing with sheeps and rabbits on a peaceful grassland. And my hubby is out with his mates; for their male bonding "drinking" session. :) So its a real treat for me to have this quiet moment all to myself. A moment where I can breathe in slowly and enjoy the occasional sound of the planes flying pass.

Its way past bedtime for me. Thou I'm relatively tired, I can't seem to STOP my hectic mind from thinking and reflecting on today's events. So to distract myself, I tune in to my favorite music and played low IQ games, trying to let the beautiful lyrics fill my head instead.

Sigh... I know if I close my eyes now, I'll let my soul drift away, dance with the wind and let the rain fall thru me. A night like this always do this to me... Makes me dreamy and light. :)

Music Video

2010-04-02T16:10:00.007+08:00

Sigh... Was just surfing youtube.com again and sharing my all time favourite love song, Can't Take My Eyes Off You; originally sung by Andy Williams. Love his vocal and is DEFINITELY the song for sernading and proposing. :)

April Fool.

2010-04-02T13:22:00.002+08:00

April Fool Day wasn't exactly a day for me. In fact, its not about practical jokes of any kind; but nasty shocks and dismay. :(

First and foremost, it was the last working day for one of our senior instructor. He had to go because of his health. He was only weeks away from his official 70 years old retirement, when he found out he had Prostate Cancer. He was devastated and we were broken hearted as well. He practically watched me grew from a lil rascal to who I'm today; married with kid. Even Landis called him "Ah Pek" (Grandpapa). My heart was torn when I saw him broke down. His younger brother was with him and it was an emotional rush. I couldn't bear to look at him in the eyes, as I know I would DEFINITELY lost it. For years we see each other almost everyday and to part is a pain. Is so hard for almost everyone to accept this fact, as he was a healthy man with no serious health record. I pray that his cancer cells will stop spreading any further and for him to be strong and regain his cheerful self soon.

My nasty shock came in the afternoon when one of my 'Babe' msg me telling me her 5 years relationship and her recent engagement was all over. Initially, I thought she was pulling my leg, but when I heard her voice over the phone... I knew it was for REAL. I swallowed down my tears when I heard her crying over the phone telling me he left for another. We met up last night and she cried over and over. That jerk-ass hurted her and pushed all the blames on her. She felt so insignificant and doubted herself. Everyone told her the same sentence, "Is better you found out his unfaithfulness now, than after your wedding".

Babe, if you happened to read this post, this is for you, this trial will turn you stronger and tougher. We're all different and there will be different trials we've to go thru. Only after pains and sorrow can we truly appreciate loves and happiness. Have faith, dun lose it. We know there will be better paths out there for you. If living happily married for the rest of your life required this setback, then grind on your teeth and walk over this. It will definitely be painful now, but the sweetness later will make it all worthwhile. Dun hate, love yourself, Babe. Dun hate him, thank him for making you stronger. You may linger now. but not for long. Cause it's a whole wide world out there for you. You know we're always there.

OH YES! One more thing!!! :D I realised when we worked in different departments, with different cultures and different managing style it somehow affect the moral and perspective in a whole. I was lucky (and I hope I remain this lucky) cos the employers/heads/SOs I used to work with and even now, were all very family orientated people.

They are compassionate and always thoughtful. That said alot isn't it? We covered each other job if anything cropped up and one had to attend personal issue. We looked out for one another and we worked hard and played hard as well. :)

Recently, I heard a passing comment to my hubby saying, "You're not the only one who have a family ok." How audacity and self-centre can people get. To gain shameless dominant, that is the way they treat their fellow colleagues. Too bad, somethings the management will never know and it always seem, people always choose to believe what they hear and not what they see or experience. When he mentioned to me what he was going thru at work, I smirked. Tell me bout their ranks or education craps, BUT with this kind of behaviours its TOTAL humiliation to their current states. I laughed, so that's what they learnt from school? How enlightening! They will not be leaders with their men respecting them cos, I've seen the REAL QUALITIES in REAL Leaders that will put them to shame.

Check Up.

2010-03-25T15:46:00.003+08:00

My 1st medical check up today. :) I'm glad all went well. We saw our baby's lil heartbeat, and I can't help breathe a sigh of relief. Initially, I'm worried. Reason being, I experienced bleeding for a week and I didn't know I'm expecting then. So this scan means ALOT to me, and knowing my baby is safe... I know my prayers are heard.

My mum is worried bout my appetitie, as my intake of food is seriously pathetic. Too much and I'll be sick. I assured her that, this is just a phrase. Just wait till my craving kicks in!!! :D I've got loads of stuffs to work on but my body is not helping. My brain is so fried that I just feel like hibernating thru my pregnancy!!! LOL!!! Craps, I know! :D I'm just bullcrapping! It will be a shame to miss out the process of my baby's growth. I JUST NEED MORE SLEEP that's all. ;D People say, "a Hungry man is an Angry man", but for my case is more likely, "an Exhausted mummy is a Cranky lady"!!! LOL...

Another 4weeks till the OSCAR scan. Fingers crossed and pray for the best.

P.S: My lil Landis has been praying too. :)

Life.

2010-03-24T11:20:00.006+08:00

It has been awhile since the words spread, and YES, I'm expecting my second baby. I have yet to thank all my friends for their well wishes. Thanks, guys! :)

I know, I MIA for weeks AGAIN. :( I'm totally drained. Seriously, I don't remember being this exhausted when I'm expecting Landis then. Even with 8hours of sleep every night, I still have a hard time getting up in the morning. My back will hurt like mad and there's little I can do bout it anyways. Bear with me alittle. I'm trying to sort out my thoughts.

I'm thankful my hubby is an understanding man. He insisted that I've to have an undisturbed sleep and he would help me out in the night if Landis needed his milk. :) He told me last night, "Dear, you seem to lose your smile during your pregnancy..." I could sense his dismay. I could only assure him that I'll be fine in another month. Just let me adjust to my new body and routines. He tried to loosen me up by playing his guitar and singing my favourite songs; even Landis joined in singing and dancing. We might be poor, but my lil home is rich with loves. :)

Even with me tired all round the clock, I still spared hours with him after work. Reading his favourite books, singing, dancing, playing with his favourite toy cars... Assuring him, my love will not alter even with a second baby. Telling him, how much I love him and hugging him is such a joy. Only 2years old, Landis has already been a great help for my pregnancy. He didn't make much fuss and would treat me with care. He would hug my tummy and said, "Hug hug baby". :)

Like what my hubby always say, "Our family maybe small, but it's still good. Its always a joy to come home to see us welcoming him from a hard day work...". :) We count our blessings and we're very thankful... :)

Laughs.

2010-03-08T16:12:00.004+08:00

Does it cross your mind on how would your life be if you're with someone else instead of your current companion? I bet, no one would be honest enough to even admit to yourself, fearing guilt would wash over our conscious when comparison took place.

For me, I take this as a joke. I would laugh at my silly thoughts and even puke on those very wrong kind of guys. I could even virtualise how my life would be or how I would turn abusive and bashed the jerk. Hahaha... No harm done. LOL.

Please don't assume that I don't love my husband. In fact, I love him like nuts, I can never thought of leaving him for others. I know No One can ever love me like he does. Its just a post on how truthful would you be to yourself. I got nothing to hide and I'm not bothered with your thoughts about me. Thoughts are just thoughts... :D

Aches.

2010-03-07T11:36:00.002+08:00

My body is going thru changes and I've been feeling really tired lately. Work has been pretty alright, and I'm just taking things one step at a time. The hazey weather hasn't been doing us much good... and I'm now trapped indoor for good.

Before the haze attack, we brought Landis to ECP weeks back to mess up the sand AGAIN. LOL! He had fun no doubt and we all had a nice sun tanned. And last Saturday night, we went to the Night Safari with the tribe. :) We walked like miles and challenged our staminas. WE WERE EXHAUSTED after that! The next day, all of us experienced pains and aches EXCEPT for Landis, of course! He clinged onto us thru out the hike and we totally regret not bringing his pusher! Lesson learnt! >.<*

Another 2 weeks can I then rest my mind. Till then, I'll just smile and pray.

LaLaLa...

2010-02-18T11:03:00.003+08:00

Happy Lunar New Year, peeps. Gong Xi Fa Cai! HUAT ah...! :D

This CNY, was a blast. :) I would not go into details, but I've lots of fun with my love ones (you know who you are). Landis enjoyed himself tremendously; not with the goodies or the ang pows (red packets), but the quality times spent as a family. My hubby made lots of things possible and easy for us. For that, I'm truly grateful and thankful.

Side track alittle. At LONG last, I've the time to sit down to blog. Seriously, I would LOVE to blog more, BUT I CAN'T! NOT that I'm super busy (excuses) or whatsoever. Just that I gonna have to FILTER what I wanna blog online, so I would NOT risk blogging what I felt as UNNECESSARY. Because at the end of the day, its ALWAYS my love ones who get the nasty stuffs. And that NEVER fails to trigger the reaction of me TOP-BLOWING.

Seriously, I'm mostly a pretty harmless creature. But of course, humans were made with a dark side too and its for the best that you don't see mine. I don't whine, kick much of a fuss or even wanna attempt to give others a hard time. But when I saw and witnessed what I detest, it just pissed me right off. Really, if you have an issue with me, come and tell me right on my face and I'll DEFINATELY give you a piece of my mind too. :)

I hope in the year of Tiger, I don't meet too much people that will start the cause of an heart attack. May everything be smooth sailing, and let loves and joys surround my humble lil' home. I'll pray, and I'll pray real hard.

Love.

2010-02-05T23:24:00.005+08:00

Love Is Beyond Boundaries. We heard of this, yet not many would be fortunate enough to experience the truth in love. As I'm sharing, I'm dedicating this post to my beloved grand-uncle who passed on 2days earlier.

It was undoubtly LOVE, and to have her as his wife was the happiest day in his life. He would always remember the day and time he fetched her from her home on their wedding day; which was lunar 20th Dec @ 6.30am. And he chose that very day and time (their wedding anniversary) to depart too. Before he breathed his very last, he said things to try to make her forget him when he was gone. His son tried to revive him, but he had let go.

He was a REAL gentleman (he will probably put most men to shame). He was a 'ba-ba', English educated and was soft-spoken. My grand-aunt on the other hand, was a traditional Hokkien lady. We used to ask them how do they communicate with one speaking English and the other speaking Hokkien and Chinese. They just laughed and said they just do. You should see the way they looked at each other even after married for decades. Their eyes were filled with love and undenied understanding.

When his son found his diary after his departure, and read out to his mum (my grand-aunt)... that was when we knew why he kept asking what was the time when he was struggling to let go. He wanted to depart on the happiest time of his life. Yes, I'm weeping now while sharing this; with much heartaches and grief. As we mourned over the loss of a family member, the world lost a good man. He had battled long with his illness, and I pray he will be in good hands now. May all my good merits be with him, and cultivate a good karma for him. He will be missed. Goodbye, Grand-uncle. Goodbye...

Spring Cleaning My Thoughts

2010-02-01T09:27:00.004+08:00

I spent about 2 days SPRING CLEANING my lil home. I'm impressed with the amount of junks I dug out!!! LOL! I'll spare you guys the details. Hahaha... Anyways, the thing I enjoy most about "Spring Cleaning" is that I will always be amazed by what I misplaced; be it an object, or even memories. Seriously, I was sitting on my bed laughing with what I found for a good 10mins.

The one misplaced item I loved specially, was the piles of photo albums I once kept. I smiled at the youthfulness I once possessed, the courtship days, the schools, the friends, and the wedding... I remembered very clearly the events that took placed. The laughters, the cheers, the tears and even the hates. But no matter, I kept all that closed to me especially the misfortunes and the distaughted. In fact, I'm thankful that those crossed my paths and in turn, I learnt that we can't judge and trust, nor give people easy access to our inner thoughts. And thru years, I built up my defenses and firewalls. :) I appreciate pains, for only thru pains can we learn to appreciate the good times.

I took awhile to flip thru the albums while Landis was taking his nap, and I told my hubby, "Look at those days, and look at us now. It has been 12years in a flash."

He said, "Yes, it has been 12years and we're still so much in love." He smiled and kissed me before leaving to run his errands.

After all the pains and struggles, I still do appreciate his comforts and loves. :)

Kick Ass!

2010-01-23T15:49:00.004+08:00

I don't understand why people have this idea that engaging a domestic helper is to help you mother your OWN kids?! I'M DAMN FREAKING PISSED! Recently, people had been passing remarks and on me (obviously), saying, "OH! You got a maid to help you take care of your boy. Then you can faster give birth to another baby la!"

SERIOUSLY! I'm on the verge of slapping that whoever!!! I'M NOT THAT KIND OF MOTHER WHO JUST THROW MY CHILD TO WHOEVER AND HAVE MY SELFISH PLEASURE! I totally detest the idea of leaving my son with a stranger alone at home and I minimise leaving him with my parents and siblings as well. He is my RESPONSIBILITY. Otherwise, why do you think I will give up my job and help my Dad? HONESTLY, so that I can watch my son grow and be by his side 24/7! So what if I work longer hours for my parents? I'M HAPPY! I can see my parents everyday and be with my son. My helper is hired to do the housework MOSTLY and help me watch over my boy in the office when I'm busy. I FELT SO BLOODY OFFENDED!

FYI! My husband and I PERSONALLY take care of our son in the night (even after working the whole day). When my boy was sick, I stayed up the nights to nurse him. I home-taught him and I give him all the loves I have. Even if I'm to have a second child, I will NOT let Landis feel any difference! He will have my loves and his lil sibling's love and respect as well.

So don't you ASSUME, cos NOT all mothers are what you think they are. HEY! I'M MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE! TRUST ME!

Happy Birthday

2010-01-21T23:19:00.004+08:00

This post is dedicated to our Landis boy. Happy 2nd Birthday, Landis. May you have many more happy returns to come.

Mummy and Papa LOVE you!!! We pray for your good health & growth. May you always be surrounded with loves & goodwills. To grow with grace and be down-to-earth. :)

Loves,
Mummy & Papa.

Late.

2010-01-11T22:13:00.006+08:00

Alrighty! Greetings y'all! :0)
I know, I know, I've been M.I.A for awhile. Cause I've been really busy lately. My domestic helper had went back to Indonesia for her 2 weeks vacation before her contract renewal. So, I had to go back to basic. Except this time, I've a lil rascal tagging me round the house, trying to help. :) Yes, that's my lil boy.

Just this morning, my hubby was still REALLY uncertain to just leave us ALONE at my parents' work place. I ASSURED him nevertheless that we would be perfectly fine. I believed that our-going-two-years old Landis would not give me a hard time and would be a great help. And indeed, he was. :) He helped me pushed 4 HEAVY CARTS out of the shop! He was playing with his toy cars when he saw me trying to maneuver the heavy cart towards the door. He quickly stood up and voluntered his help. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE STRENGTH OF A 2 YEARS OLD BOY! I'm impressed that he knew what he was doing and even guided me on which cart I should push out first. :) He really made my day.

Oh! On second note!!! Today was a STRESSFUL day for ALL the high school graduates; the released of 'O'level result. When my lil sister FINALLY rang us up at 2.43pm, we were screaming with joy. She fared wonderfully and was able to get into her desired course; Chinese Studies. We hugged her the moment she stepped into the shop. Her EMO look gone and in place was the most radiant and relieved look ever.

All in all, today has been a lovely day with lots of love shown and happiness spread. OH! Just to keep you updated, my seedlings have bloom beautifully. And I've started cultivating flowering plants as well. Hmmm... regarding The Pepper Volcano Chilli?? I FAILED!!! But I'm not giving up just yet. I'll try again and again with more patiences and loves. :) Ciaos.

P.S: Hubby, thank you for your help and supports. I really appreciate it. :) You've outdone yourself. :)

A New Start

2010-01-01T12:15:00.011+08:00

Hello, Earthlings! :) It's the start of 2010! Its GREAT to be home relaxing but my hubby has to work today, and he was feeling pretty reluctant. LOL! Well, its his job so he can't grumble. Landis is feeling much better after seeing the Chinese sinseh. His bloated tummy, gone and today he manages to finish his bowl of porridge. PHEW! His teething really gives us HEADACHES. But I'm glad this new year is too, a good start for my boy. =)

For the past 2weeks, I'm occupying myself with my hobby. GARDENING. :) I'm cultivating Tropical Tomatoes, Egg Tomatoes, Long Tom and Pepper Volcano (Chilli); all from seeds. I'm happy to announce, all the seedlings have sprouted except Pepper Volcano as it requires a longer "sprouting" time. :) When I was younger, my Dad introduced gardening to me. I'm thankful to have his gift; the green fingers. We would cultivate lots of flowering plants and vegetables in the plot of garden behind our shop (the garden was long gone after the reconstruction :'S). Then, we had young papaya tree, chilli plants, fern plants, aloe vera... ... ... My Dad would plow and fertilize the soil, just like what he did yesterday to his potted plants. He even let Landis "helped", aka played with the soil. LOL! :D

He said to us, "In the past, you have to opportunity to play with soil and get all dirty. You can rear domestic animals like chicken. But look at Landis now? The only chance of him seeing a live chicken is in the zoo!!"

Yup! How true. It really got us thinking of the enviroment now. Our children today really lose the simple childhood and child play we used to enjoy. Of course, many will say that we have to improve and move with the global pace. But, is it worth the exchange of our children's innocence and growth? Will you trade your child's moral values to a richer society? That is how absurd our world has become. My new year resolution? To play a more active role in conserving our world, Reduce, Reuse & Recycle. Plus to educate Landis the importance of Mother Nature and appreciate her. :) I believe there is still goodness in mankind, we just have to spare a minute to ask ourselves what we really NEED instead of what we really WANT. We NEED to do our part to save our Mother Earth, otherwise our WANTs will not even EXIST, isn't it?

To end the note here, I'll share the pictures of my seedlings' sweet growth. :)

Presenting my Tropical Tomatoes and Egg Plant Long Tom :)

And last but not least, my Egg Tomatoes and Pepper Volcano Chilli. :) Cheers.

Happy New Year

2009-12-31T23:55:00.002+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR, PEEPS! :)

May the new year be a start of a FRESH beginning.

Signing off for now,
Kimmy :)

All And All.

2009-12-27T01:09:00.003+08:00

MERRY BELATED CHRISTMAS! :)
Christmas eve and Christmas day had been wonderful. Its filled with lots of LAUGHTERS and LOVES. And yes, am back to work today. :)

My dad had been feeling really lousy with his badly swollen gum. This morning, I went to the clinic and dential to seek advise. Coincidence, my parents had a wedding dinner to attend and so my sister had to attend in his behalf. After they left for the banquet, Landis accompanied Dad in the shop while I bought dinner for him and companied him eat.

I watched him. He IS aging and I can't ignored the lines formed around his eyes and forehead. He IS lonely and IS starting to lose his momentum. He knew I had guests coming over tonight and urged me to go home. He assured me in his way that he would be fine. I wanted him to go home, but he planned to wait for my mum and sister.

I hear him sing... I hear his weariness and lonliness. My heart ACHE. He has always been my pillar. Thou people wanna bring him down and misunderstood him, he stayed strong. He is the power that moulded me to who I am today.

I always tell myself, "I'm living with fighters (my dad & hubby), I must be strong to be worthy of their strength".

I drove home with teary eyes and aching heart. As I grew older, the more I wanna hold them (my loved ones) closer.

Its Failing.

2009-12-20T10:12:00.002+08:00

My body is failing me. My head is at the verge of bursting into pieces. I'm so deprive of sleep these days. I'm sitting at the table with a box of tissue (for my "leaking" nose) on my side and a cup of hot coffee to keep me saint and AWAKE.

Lil Landis has been waking almost every night crying in pain. Yes, it's the teething season AGAIN. :( Even his fever/painkiller medicine is not taking much troll. I pray hard this phrase will be over soon. I'm so exhausted that I lose my appetite, patience and smiles.

SERIOUSLY, I can't hold on for very long. Too much stuffs require my attention. I'm only a human. I'm in need of a BREATHER!

"Hang in there, Kimmy! Have faith everything will be fine. Be strong." This is what I've been telling myself EVERYDAY for the past weeks. I grind my teeth shut, hold back my drowsiness, shut myself away from my wild paranoids and swallow down all the pains. I've got to fashion my expressions to prevent my tiredness from revealing.

Give me a few days to withdraw into my own inner space. I promise I will emerge with much composure as you will usually see in me again.

Welcome Home!!

2009-12-15T11:07:00.005+08:00

Jessy! Welcome HOME to our Sunny Island, Singapore!!! :)

Yesterday morning, I don't need a second snooze to wake up. I jumped up once my hubby pat my head at 4.55am... I'm wide awake and excited, cos my darling sister was returning home from Holland. I was so jumpy (in a good way) and ecsatic.

At the airport, we hugged and teared alittle. Its so good to have her back into our embraces. We chatted NON-STOP and OF COS!!! HIT the saloon in the afternoon. We came home shocking everyone with our new hairdos and COLOURS!!!! LOL!!! :) Even Rebecca (my "half" sister), couldn't resist the temptations to join us! Wahahaha... :) Well, no sneak preview for now, let the suspense go alittle longer. ;P

Not forgetting, I have to thank my nice lil brother of mine; who sat in for me the whole day while we were turning the saloon upside down. Thanks, dude. :) Appreciate it.

Christmas eve in 9days!!! Its looking really good now with her returning and all of us united with much to tell and laughters to share. I say, NO MORE to oversea calls, online chat and lousy connection!!! Our family is complete once again. :)

Last Christmas

2009-12-13T00:09:00.015+08:00

Its late at night with both my darling boys comfortably tucked in. Well, I can't get to sleep. So I browsed thru youtube and found my all time favourite Christmas music video; LAST CHRISTMAS. YUP. Is an old school kinda music video, BUT it just went so well with the ambience and tempo of the song. The lyrics, needless to say, is sad yet blended perfectly to my script of how your love would want you so bad when you meet again after a year long... *told you I'm a hopeless romance freak!!!

Christmas is merely 2weeks away from now and almost all the radio stations are filling the air with Christmas songs. I TOTALLY AM LIVING IN IT! :)

For the past 26years, I'm still hopeful that I will be in Santa's visit list. Wouldn't it be an honour to see a REAL Santa Clause? If I don't get to see him this year, it must be, I haven't been good enough. Anyways, enjoy with me this music video. :)

The Woman's Quote

2009-12-11T09:49:00.004+08:00

I used to collect all the beautiful & inspirational quotes or even poems in a lil scrape book. I will read them over and over again. You may call me a hopeless romance freak, but reading poetry lift my spirit in numerous ways. I will reflect and lived in nostalgia for an hour or two. At times, escape into my "inner" world and cried over sentimental memories.

Being a woman is tough enough. It doesn't make it any better that we are 'supposedly claimed' to being unpredictable and men can NEVER get it. :(

Here I share one of my personal favourite; by Hebrew Talmud.

"Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's rib, not from his feet to be walked on, not from his head to be superior, but from his side to be equal, under the arms to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved."

Lovely isn't it? Sigh... :)

The Arrggg Day

2009-12-05T22:03:00.003+08:00

NOW I'm feeling more HUMAN than minutes back. This harsh weather is seriously driving me NUTS! :( After enjoying a hot shower, I felt soooo much better. Recently, it has been pouring hard and having the monthly lady sickness isn't making me any better. I guess the usual imbalanced hormones are acting up AGAIN. Aarrggghhh..... =_=!!

I NEED A GOOD REST tonight. It will be another long day tomorrow with 2 weddings to attend. Wish me luck! >.<*

Dad.

2009-12-04T11:21:00.004+08:00

My right eyelid has been twitching. Hmmm... It means something GOOD will be happening soon. That's according to my Mum's cute theory. :) Alright, I'll be waiting. LOL.

Papa came back after his driving teaching. He said the most hilarious statement ever. He was wearing this really BIG jade ring that his late eldest brother gave him. Then he asked me and my Mum, "You know why I wear this ring while teaching?"

Mum: "Cause you haven't been wearing this for awhile?"

Me (I teased) : "Cause if your student gets on your nerves, you'll use that to knock on his head??" LOL... ;P

HE REPLIED: "NO. Cause I wanna remind myself that my eldest brother died of HEART ATTACK! Then when my student really get on my nerves, I must keep calm!!! Wahahaha..."

My Mum and I CRACKed up! =D

These days, everybody and everyone has been asking me to go on a HOLIDAY with my Hubby!! My parents especially. They have already told me where is a great place to go and where to shop... And they will be most happy to look after Landis for me!!! They were so enthu that my hubby even said, "I'll go buy tickets NOW! We'll go in 2weeks time!!" WTH!! I WAS SHOCKED! My hubby was enthu! He told me, "I'll bring you to somewhere nice." :) Excited. LOL! =D

Yes, I'm ecsatic. BUT, I told them not in 2weeks time. Cause Jessy will be home on the 14th (from Holland) and I wanna spend time with them (Jessy & Catty). I don't wanna miss out our holiday shopping and of cos all our sisterly stuffs. Not for anything in the world. So yup, my holiday can wait for now. :)

A Great Sunday

2009-11-29T23:46:00.006+08:00

As usual, my Sunday is always fruitfully spend. For today, we meet up with my dearest kakis (Fionna, Kevin & Darling Renee) for dinner @ Ang Mo Kio Hub. Well, we dined in Fish&Co. and their service was pretty good. Their staffs were nice and catered to our needs very well. 2 thumbs up. :)

With our prams and our not-very-co-operative kids, our shopping was minimum and TOUGH!!! It was hard to move round the crowded mall; as not many people had good patience with mummy pushing pram! :( Thou the meeting up lasted only couple of hours, it was really sweet to see how much my lil god daughter, Renee has grown, and of course how much my lil Landis enjoyed himself. Its a pleasant way to start the week. :)

Play Our Part

2009-11-26T09:38:00.008+08:00

Recent years, we have heard and witnessed numerous disasters happening in our neighbouring countries. We were talking bout floods, earthquakes, Tsunami; all namely the NATURAL disasters. Many innocent lives were lost, houses torn apart, unmendable broken homes, children were made orphans in less than an hour, and old grandmama mourning over her lost childrens...

YES! We witnessed the ruins of the horrifying disasters. Constantly, we were reminded of the damaged and how badly injuried our EARTH has been. We worried endlessly on the survival for our next generations. We teared viewing such tragics and we always want to help in a way or another. Now HERE IT IS.

United Nations has launched a global campaign to urge all to sign an online petition naming (pls click) "SEAL THE DEAL". This deal will be seen as a reminder that our global leaders must balance a just and effective agreement in Copenhagen; ensuring the purpose and result of the deal will benefit the survival of human race, protect the green growth and the planet. The Climate Conference I mentioned, will be held in Copenhagen from 6 - 18 Dec 2009. Currently, we only obtained 405089 signatures for the petition. We NEED MORE, people! We NEED YOU!

Let's help make our Earth a better place to live on. For my loved ones, my friends and those suffering, I've sign the petition. Do the right thing. :)

P.S: Rebecca, thanks for sharing. :)

The Belated Post

2009-11-24T22:16:00.007+08:00

Happy Birthday, Darling! :) Sorry, peeps! Was supposed to upload this sooner. BUT unfortunately, I caught a terrible flu bug that caused me to KO (knocked out). Arrggg... and guess what!? I heard this was the "LATEST" bug in town! A NUISANCE! =.=!!!

Back to the birthday celebration. It was a nice and cheery one, thou I did know HE dreaded it. For him, 31 seem like a HUGE number (I can't imagine 41!!!) which I'm still trying hard to be sympathetic about. Hey, Love. If you happen to read this, I would like you to know... You're still the BEST!!! :) Numbers don't change anything; for that matter of fact. :) No matter what others may say, or even talk about; don't let that affect you too much. Just remember, WE LOVE YOU, and that's all that matters. :)

P.S: Thanks for taking a day off to take care of me and running errands. It's really sweet of you. :)

The Gentleman.

2009-11-22T11:07:00.007+08:00

Catherine aka Catty (my baby sister) and I were betting and guessing, 'what will my hubby face look like after queueing on our behalf to purchase our merchanises in such a ridiculously long queue'. Will he exit with frustration? Irritation? Or worst, gave me his earful nag? We know MEN do NOT enjoy shopping, they especially dread to be drag to sales. Moreover, talking bout volunteering to queue for us, total FAT CHANCE, babe! =.=!

After nearing 30mins, his phone call came first,

"Love, where're you? You give me a minute, nature call, I go to the toilet first."

He sounded fine. When he walked up to us, he smiled and mentioned the queue was long. FULL STOP. "What do you want for dinner? I'll go buy and take away." That was his second statement. He found an empty seat for us to settle lil Landis and our stuffs, while he went to buy our dinner in yet another crowded Burger King.

I say, is hard to come by man with such respect and patience for his wife. I'm thankful and grateful. :)

Cat gave me a "crash" course in biology. Thank goodness, I did NOT take Biology in my high school days. I think I would DEFINATELY screw it up without much difficulties! LOL! *Cat, dun u laugh! It all started out with me talking bout the special needs children I taught years ago. Cat explained it was to do with the child's chromosome. She patiently explained and with much enthu, the process of the growth in cells... Please don't expect me to explain, cos most likely I will get all the facts wrong and I (sadly) can't recall the names of the different processes. :(

Anyways, I'm proud to remember this equation she taught me thou:

(Mummy) 23 X chromosome + (Daddy) 22 X chromosome + 1 Y chromosome = LANDIS! :)

Cat, at least your 45mins lecture still do some good to me. Hahaha... :D Will be back with more updates today. :) Ciaos Peeps! :)

Shopping Getaway

2009-05-20T17:15:00.004+08:00

"DA JIE! When're you going to BLOG?!" ~ whined Catty (my baby sister). OH YES! It has been a LONG time since I scribble online. Well, with me helping out my Papa for almost 12hrs everyday & revolving around my lil baby boy, Landis; my brain is almost dead by the night! LOL. :D

It has been AGES since I went for a shopping spree with my hubby. My dearest baby sister was real swweeettt... to cover me in the evening last night and I found myself a getaway. :) My hubby was hysterical! He took me for dinner @ Ajisan (our all time fav Japan eat out), managed to purchase 2 tops (@ Cotton On), the fancy papers I needed to work on for my Christmas Invites and off we went for the JL Sales @ Expo. :D

I totally adore the apparels @ Cotton On. The simple designs and the good quality fabrics are DEFINATELY worth the pennies. I used to be a huge fan for MANGO. But looking at their current collections... turn me off (sadly). Let's just say, they lost their initial charisma and the simplicity in a garment. Anyways, I will be back to MANGO anytime if they're to produce simple versatile designs for their summer/spring collection. REALLY. :)

My hubby bought TOYS for Landis @ JL Sales! *shake head. Now who is spoiling Landis rotten?! =_=!! Oh, FYI! My sisters and I are suckers for JL Sales! LOL! =D If you're lucky, you might get some good bargains! >.< Personally, I prefer JL Sales to Metro Sales. The products are in wider ranges and their qualities are unfair to be labeled as "sales" goods. =P JESSY IS COMING HOME IN 24 DAYS!!! Random, I know! =) We Miss Her Soooo Much! So here, I stop my scribbles. Ciaos! =D